ignored (tw sh urges)

im so sad and desperate when she ignores me and i can see that she texts another ppl rn but not me. i dont get it, why would u say that talking to me makes u feel better and then just. not talk to me?

and it sickens me so much when i think of her finding a replacement for me that i wanna tear myself apart. i mean we have all those plans to move in together but what if she founds someone better and moves in with them instead 

probably the saddest part is that i cant even talk about all of these because she immediately thinks i dont trust her and gets angry (which makes me feel even worse) 

i feel the urge to sh & isolate myself again fuck