Just some stuff I guess.

Like, to be honest. I really want someone to hold. I'm so lonely.

I really want someone to love, but I'm afraid that I'll ruin it again, like I always do. Everytime a woman opens up and expresses their feelings to me, I go and ruin it. Maybe because it was too fast a sudden, but I accept a relationship without thinking twice. I just rush into a relationships even though I don't actually love the girl, and I end up breaking their heart. I'm such a pushover (if that makes sense here), and selfess sometimes. Like, I want to make everyone happy, but I never try and say what I actually feel. And that is a horrible mentality. Now I can't even find someone because I can't say how I actually feel, and I'd be thinking, I'd just be making my crush feel awkward and weird about me. I'd also be thinking in my head, "If I ever start a relationship with this girl I love so much, what can I do, and what do I have to keep it going?" I'm just too awkward, shy, and kinda plain. I just don't have the means in keeping relationships going. I just want someone. And I am too desperate.

Like, to sum it up, I'm just fucking lonely. Lol. It's hard to find someone nowadays. Please don't take that the wrong way.

Just a vent. I do these once in a lifetime. Thank you for listening.