Testosterone

Yesterday I told the stars about you

From the seven-hour flight and the forty-minute walk

They don't have to understand

If we think about the promise we made

"I swear I'm not crazy"

I know that's the dirtiest lie you ever told.


The rain seems suffocating

But only there I can breathe

For that last painting, that last letter

The last word I said

Because I can't remember the verses

I feel like my tongue has been cut out

I feel like I should wash my mouth with soap


All I think about is what I don't have

While the water overflows

Pathetic, I know

From the time I was born until I die

Until an archaeologist finds my broken bones


Cry, over this city of broken sky

And just think about last December

In the shadow that stalked me

Most of the time I convince myself that I survived

And if what they say is true

It will be one of the many things I will regret.

Because it's too late for plan B


I'm dying submerged in a bathtub

Well I know that I will never stop disappointing you

You know how I feel?

You know what I mean?

I will never let you go


Between anxiety and fear

Between love and emptiness

Completely clueless

In my sleep paralysis

In the wet brush

Maybe I lost it again


And among so many broken paintings,

This is my testosterone treatment

In a simple performance

There is the feeling that I achieved something

May it not be just disappointment

Praying for better days


I'm stuck believing

And believe that your look in my painting has life

To write more of my misery after her

Until spring comes

Today maybe I'll see them again

Whom they made me believe


Yeah, it's great, I'll be fine.

If you don't see my nervous breakdown

Tangled in a spider web

Twist the knife a little harder

Don't look at me, I'm thinking about death.


-Burn!


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