Yesterday I told the stars about you
From the seven-hour flight and the forty-minute walk
They don't have to understand
If we think about the promise we made
"I swear I'm not crazy"
I know that's the dirtiest lie you ever told.
The rain seems suffocating
But only there I can breathe
For that last painting, that last letter
The last word I said
Because I can't remember the verses
I feel like my tongue has been cut out
I feel like I should wash my mouth with soap
All I think about is what I don't have
While the water overflows
Pathetic, I know
From the time I was born until I die
Until an archaeologist finds my broken bones
Cry, over this city of broken sky
And just think about last December
In the shadow that stalked me
Most of the time I convince myself that I survived
And if what they say is true
It will be one of the many things I will regret.
Because it's too late for plan B
I'm dying submerged in a bathtub
Well I know that I will never stop disappointing you
You know how I feel?
You know what I mean?
I will never let you go
Between anxiety and fear
Between love and emptiness
In my sleep paralysis
In the wet brush
Maybe I lost it again
And among so many broken paintings,
This is my testosterone treatment
In a simple performance
There is the feeling that I achieved something
May it not be just disappointment
Praying for better days
I'm stuck believing
And believe that your look in my painting has life
To write more of my misery after her
Until spring comes
Today maybe I'll see them again
Whom they made me believe
Yeah, it's great, I'll be fine.
If you don't see my nervous breakdown
Tangled in a spider web
Twist the knife a little harder
Don't look at me, I'm thinking about death.