Fahkin rhetahds

SO IM GOIN DOWN TO MY LOCAL DANKIN DOUHNUTS AND THIS CHINESE WANTS ME TO SHUCK HIM OFF FOUR A BIG BLUE SPRINKLER DAHNUT. AND IM OVA HEA LIKE “WOAH WOAH WOAH, WHAT DA FAHK DID YOUS JUST SAY TO ME?!?!” “LIKE ASK ME OUTTA SOMTHIN DOOD LIKE WOW” AND HE’S OVA HEA LIKE “DOOD YOUS STUPID OR SOMETHIN, THE DATE IS THE CAHCK SHUCKING AND THE FREE DAHNUT” ANYWAYS IM DONE SHUCKING THIS ASIAN CAHK AND WE GO INTO THE DANKIN AND THE CASHEER SAYS THEY DONT GOT THE DAUHNUT THAT I WAS PROMISED BY THEIS YELLA BASTAD AND IM LIKE TO THE CASHEIR LIKE “AH YOU DEAF YOU DUAMB MOTHA FUCKA I WANT MY DOUGHNUT” 

LAST TIME I GO TO WILLIAMSBURG FAH A DECENT DAHNUT, FAHKIN REtahds.

- Bill Burr