Never Again

Never Again

Never again will I betray those that I love because never again do I myself deserve to be loved. What kind of person would love the monster I became even though that monster is no more? A victim of his own humility and regret, the monster within forever wishing it could turn back the hands of time, boils in his never ending misery regarding the things that it has done. I am not this monster! The monster was within me, never again to return due to my excessive hatred of it, moving on to somebody that welcomes it's occupancy, but leaving me an empty she'll unless the self- loathing and discuss that muddles my mind is to be taken into account.

This is reassuring. To know that the feelings I harbor and associate with the monster within are actually my own....Does this make me human? Monsters can not feel humility, regret or remorse. Nor does a monster feel misery as it is the author of misery.

These points provide me with the evidence to prove the monster is gone never again to return. So what's left is all me...the real me. Minus the addictions that turned me into that which I hated the most.

But even so, never again shall I be loved. Never again will I look with love into the eyes of those that once loved me. Never again will I be sombodys hero, protector, lover, or goofball source of entertainment. Never again will I plan for my families future. Never again will I share sunsets with the woman I love. Never again will I be the proudest person at a school concert. Never again will I have a special person to brag about to others nor a teammate in this game called life. Never again will I regain that which I lost after fighting so hard for many years to aquire. Never again will I be happy and forever without family, I wallow in a sea of memories that I hold dear to my heart though they continue to produce the only tears I've shed since I was little.

A fitting sentence indeed.