Staying inside

Im so fucking alone idk why but like WHY THE FUCK do humans need to go outside and meet people, socialize, work, study, and learn, why cant I just be dumb as fuck and go about my day being silly on the internet? Why did the world have to come to this? I could've been an underpaid paperboy in my past life and without a DOUBT, I would've probably killed myself with an ice pick due to the amount of fucking newspapers I had to give out. You wanna know what I think? I think people should turn into fucking fish so we can all swim and smell like shitty scaley fishes so people don't feel like going outside anymore due to the amount of PUNGENT FISH SMELL there is whenever someone goes out. and if one person tried to act smart and invent a way to make everyone get used to the smell of fish, and help people communicate and interact like the way humanity did before the fish evolution, I will be right there in their most vulnerable moment and fill their mouth with sand until they convulse from the dryness and lack of moisture in their mouth and lungs until their existence is no more. After that, im gonna cook them with Cajun seasoning, a bit of salt, some butter, and I might even remove their scales to make the skin extra crispy, some lemon too, probably fry them for max 3 minutes until their skin is golden brown and I am going to feast, I'm going to feast on that fuckers well and properly cooked body  with no shame or a slight hint of remorse. I will then go ahead and mail their bones to their parents to scar them for the rest of their life. That's pretty much it, thanks for reading.