living on my own

so i'm living in an apartment by myself after having roommates for the past two years. it's simultaneously freeing and fucking terrifying. it's nice in some ways, like never worrying about having to clean up another person's mess and being able to bring people home and not caring about how loud we are. it's scary because i've never had to pay so much in rent, and my job just cut my hours in half because the work season is almost over. thankfully i found a foodbank that gave me a metric fuck-ton of food, and they're also going to help me with my electric bill! it's no relieving not having to worry about whether or not i'm going to be able to eat in a day. i genuinely cried when i got all of this food home. the effects of growing up food-insecure, i guess. anyways, i hope that things start falling into place here soon. i'd really like to be able to not have a panic attack every other day worrying about whether or not i'm going to have enough money to pay my rent.