A Super Cringy Declaration of Love From Awhile Ago .

I’ve had a crush on you for like 3 months, we’ve never talked because I’m too scared, I guess that I’ll look stupid or that you’ll hate me or something, but now I feel like its too late. It’s probably not, but I seriously cannot talk to you for the life of me.

You probably think I hate you too, but I don’t! I just look like a bitch all the time. I feel like you kinda do the same thing, y’know the resting bitch face thing. I don’t know if its as conscious for you as it is for me, but I do it so people don’t talk to me because, to be honest, I am really fucking sensitive. Like the littlest thing sets me off and im sad for like several hours to a week, so…

Anyways, it kinda happened really suddenly, like, in ceramics, I just looked at you and it just happened. Id describe it more poetically, but honestly, just writing this is cringy enough, so I wont. 

But god, holy shit, you’re gorgeous. This is really fucking weird, but like, in ceramics and lit/research and study hall, I just like,,,look at you. You’re just so pretty and nice and I would love to even just be friends with you, but yknow the talking thing. I just feel like you wouldn’t be interested in being friends with me and it’d suck and I don’t wanna put myself through that? It would probably be fine, but ahah I’ll never know. 

I just wish you’d talk to me first, like it’d be super nerve racking for me, but less so than me doing it. At least then id know you didn’t hate me.

Also, if I ever send this to you (I won’t), ill leave this part out: you probably thought you looked bad today in study hall when you adjusted your hair for a solid 30 seconds, but I thought you were beautiful. I’ve noticed you do that, (im sorry im so weird) it seems like you don’t like the way you look, at least hair wise, but honest to god, you’re so pretty. Even when your hair is messy, you’re always pretty. I wish I could somehow telepathically send that to you, because I don’t want you to think that youre not. Im probably reading WAY too much into it, and I need to be less weird and not stare at you and your friends probably think im weird and im sorry, but I wish I could talk to you. I really wish I could.

goodbye,

A person who cannot fucking talk to you

(its been a bit .  i think im over it now)