TW: suicidal thoughts

I have this void inside of me.

I cant fill it.

No matter how hard i try.

Ive tried for years.

It just keeps 

Getting bigger.

Its a black hole.

It sucks everything good inside of it

And keeps it away from me.

Its slowly consuming me.

It hurts.

Its a dull pain.

I listen to music.

I eat.

I see my friends.

I see my parents.

I vape.

I look at pretty pictures on my phone.

I do fucking everything 

And it never goes away.

What do i have to do?

Tell me.

Please.

I thought that maybe love would fill it.

I tried to love.

Maybe i didnt try hard enough.

Because ever time ive tried,

Its just made the void bigger.

Maybe

if i kill myself

Itll go away.

n.c.