goodbye summer (vent)

i will never get used to the feeling of fall around the corner and summer leaving. i have always hated despised fall and winter. it just reminds me of that uncomfortable, stomach-churning school starts soon feeling. its always made me nauseous knowing summer is over and my "freedom" is gone.

no more waking up as late as i want. no more planning things with friends on whatever date at whatever time. no more traveling. no more heat. no more spring/summer fashion.

now its that time of the year where back to school shopping is in and i have to worry about assignments all over again.

luckily, i don't have that same nauseating feeling because i just graduated high school in the spring, so now im starting college which the first day of school is much later than high school. nevertheless, im not happy.

school is expensive and i have classes monday-friday which i might get changed cause i dont want to be showing up when theres an option for online classes but im scared those are full. anyways, my latest class ends at 4:50PM??? what the fuck?? thats fucking unfortunate. the only bright side to starting college rather than any grade below that is i dont have to go, yk? like k-12th grade is mandatory by law and since im done with that, i technically could be done with school forever. but yk, im not gonna do that cause i wanna be a psychiatrist and thats like an additional 12 years of college so lol wont be done till im basically 30 wtf ;/

but im trying to look at the positives. its really hard though, especially because i am a proud fall/winter hater (always have been, probably even more as a child)

its monsoon season so now its super cloudy and rainy all of a sudden in my usually VERY hot (100-115°F) and dry city. what sucks especially about it is im a lifeguard and now the water park i work at is closed weekdays since school started the first week of august, so now im working much less hours. its my first job and i absolutely love it because its such an epitome of summer: water slides, summer heat, golden tans (might've gotten a little TOO tan since working there), and cute outfits.

saying goodbye to summer is always the most heartbreaking feeling every year. of course i love fall/winter activities like haunted houses, pumpkin patches, halloween, christmas, etc, but it never lives up to the same happy, care free feeling summer gives me. my first day of school is next week so im trying to enjoy my last few days of summer freedom before i have that busy, school-schedule again.

so goodbye to summer and hello to back to school season.