*cries uncontrollably*

im so terrified that i am wasting every moment of my life and that everything that i am doing right now is pointless. writing this feels like its so dumb and im so scared that none of the way that im doing what im doing is how im supposed to do it. i feel like i should be working on my f!cking uni. papers and looking for a job but im writing this because then that has to mean that at least im doing something and it feels like something sometimes. or at least the start of something. or the thoughts of starting to start something. i feel like i have to choose between doing this, and getting better grades, and finding a job, and stay disciplined with my health. and if anyone even tried to ask me to explain my thought process in how i plan to figure everything out all i would be able to do is