alone

I've realized in my 14 almost 15 years on this earth, that you are alone and no matter how hard you try, avoiding this emptiness is inevitable. every adult has faced it one way or another. of course it hurts, and everyone goes through it, but i feel like nobody talks about how outcasted you are. you feel as if you are the moon on a sunny day, its there, but nobody acknowledges it. your feelings are invalidated because you are a teenager and what you feel doesn't matter until your in your mid twenties because that's when everyone is important or something. you feel as if you are in a constant battle with yourself and everyone around you. nobody gets it, nobody gets what you feel. nobody knows what your thinking from when you wake up to when you go to sleep. when your friend takes you to "a new spot" but you used to spend time here with your grandpa when you were little. nobody is you and no one will ever know how you feel. growing up makes the world dull. the beauties of your childhood being taken from you. the comforting smell of your childhood,  you don't search for the books in drawings anymore, your life isn't colourful anymore. nobody knows you deep down, and that's scary.