um i'm pregnant.... *trigger warning for abortion topic, etc*

so.. i just found out i am indeed preggo. i'm not sure how i feel really. i think part of me is scared and sad of losing myself. my dream was to travel the world and i know i can still do it but it just wouldn't be the way i wanted to. the father is in the picture and we're dating so it's not like i don't have the support. i'm just scared really. i couldn't bring myself to abort the baby. i found out i'm 10 weeks now. i just feel like i can't give them the best financial life, i mean i still have one year of college left. it's due in the spring semester so i know i wouldn't be able to graduate in the spring anymore.  i don't know, i just thought i had much more time than to be a mom right now. i know it's my fault and i take full responsibility for the child but i still have feelings. especially about losing that part of myself. i haven't told my friends, i just feel embarrassed. i know i shouldn't but i do. i also just don't think they're good friends, i don't want to tell anyone because i don't want bad vibes towards the baby. thankfully i don't have any big or bad pregnancy symptoms. just tired and nauseous. i'm also scared that i'll be a bad mom. i feel like i'm just a kid who just became an adult so fast. being responsible for an entire person is such a big life changing event. i think i know deep down i'll be okay and it'll turn out fine, it's just anything could go wrong. i don't really know why i'm writing about this on a public site. i think i just really needed to vent it out. am i wrong for feeling bad? shouldn't i fully be happy about it? i don't know... i'm just really tired and stressed all the time.