lotta things happening

a lotta things going on in my life recently. none of them are good. they're all actually very bad.

except maybe a couple of minor things.

i'm going to my friend's house on sunday, her name is steph. we are gonna watch insidious 1 and eat snacks. i started a creative server with some of my buddies about a week or two ago, might share screenshots of our builds but so far there's; a taco bell, a fancy hibachi mcdonalds, a burger king called "burberkink" (idk how to make G's on banners), a papa's pizzeria, a pokecenter, a pokemon gym, a gamestop, a spencer's beside the gamestop called "cockpussystop" (love my friends), a motel, and a casa de castellanos (urban restaurant in california).

there's also a small area in the map we call "chicago", there's a gun store, a seven eleven, a starbucks, and lil b's burritos (???).

another cool thing is that one of my buddies made a modded survival world and we've been playing on it for a couple days. we live in an airship that's naturally generated thanks to one of the mods, we go conquer dungeons n shit all the time.

and my mom gets out of jail on monday, she's gonna help us (my/our family) get our house in order so it doesn't get condemned. only reason it's being threatened to be condemned is because my granny is a hoarder and the inside is a freakshow, i'll spare details. the outsides kind of a mess too, although i dont really have any problems with it, its just a lot of the grass is overgrown so code enforcement has a giant stick in their ass about it (i actually like having greenery around my house. pussy city folk.)

i don't really want to go into too much detail about all the bad shit, but i will say one of my closest friends is no longer one of my closest friends, and it kind of sucks but i'm coming to realize it's for the best that we aren't friends anymore. we kind of both hurt each other.

there's just so much shit i'm stressing over. i don't wanna lose my place, i lost a dear friend, i'm scared of losing more friends, i gotta oversee so much crap. worst of all i don't even get paid for it.

i gotta carry all this shit for *free*. how fucked up is that?

anyways. might bust a few eggs on my head. i don't know. i feel like a leaf in a hurricane.

everything is sort of spiraling out of control.

and i'm too scared to talk to any of my friends about any of it, lest i lose them too.

that's all. cya.