vent???

im only saying this on here because this is the only platform that none of my irl friends/people know im on. lately i've been feeling super unmotivated to do anything. like i used to love to go to the park and go rollerskating. now i don't feel motivated and i've lost love for that hobby along with serveral other hobbies of mine. rollerskating was my only form of exercise for the summer and now that im not doing it i feel disgusted with myself, it feels like fat is spreading and filling every crevice of my body. maybe its because of the lack of socialization or my insomnia idk. everytime i try to talk with my friends on the phone they're always busy and say "ill call you later tho" and it never happens. my insomnia has also gotten worse because i go on the internet or my phone when i get bored or when nobody will talk to me. because of me going on the internet for days on end i don't get enough sleep, like im talking 5-6 hours of sleep because if i put my phone down i'll just lay there struggling to get sleep. also finished my drivers ed course and i dont even want to drive cuz it scares me, im only going to get my permit because my parents want me to. everything annoys me now, anytime my mom talks or gets mad at me over the smallest thing i feel like going outside to take a walk or go skating but i know i cant because then she would get even more pissed and that would only make me even more annoyed.  im not even looking forward to my birthday which is coming up soon because the first day of school is on my bday. i always wanted a sweet sixteen since i couldn't have a quincenera, i made plans and everything and even my dad was on board with the plan. but of course my mom had to come bitch and whine about how it would be expensive even when she wouldn't be paying for it. so my party got cancelled so i dont look forward to my bday in fact i hate it now because it reminds me i won't be a silly girly teen girl forever. everything just feels so wrong right now its summer im not supposed to have all these worries if anyone has any advice please share cuz i could really use it right now.