letter that he will NEVER EVER read or know about

to my sweet and handsome boy.

how can i start this?! i just dont have any words to describe how much i love you. i have such a bad memory but when it comes about you, i can remember everything. i love spending all my time with you, just the two of us. when im with you i feel like im something just for being the real me. and suddenly, every music and romance movie becomes about you. 

when i first met you, i never EVER thought that you will make such difference in my life, i just became a new person, one person im genuinely loving. the best version of me. you showed me so much about this life even being more young than me lol!!! i really adore you :(

im so glad that im your girlfriend and for being the first of everything. i wanna make you so much happier than you make me to. i wanna show you the real love and the kind one. even that im not a good gf but i promise that im trying soooo much. 

you dont even know that an anonymous people told me im just using you and replacing someone from my past with you.. i didn't told you bc i dont want to you overthink about something so rude like this. i know all my feelings for you but i know how insecure you are. if i was the same old person i used to be, i would make this such a big deal and fight with whatever this people are. but because of you, i just learned to ignore all of them. just say whatever you want. i dont care. no anymore. i know who im and how i REALLY feel. just insecure people lol lol lol

im trying to love me and leave behind all of my insecurities. im getting inspired of some other girls instead of comparing myself. i wanna be the best version of me every single day and show you that. thank you for everything, even you didn't knowing about that stuffs bc im so shy to tell you yet. wait for me,  pretty!!!

i LOVE you!!!!!! 16th will become 2 months of us, 

a lot of kisses <3