sorry this is gonna sound really stupid

idrk what to say on here but like i'm not feeling the best recently and i know the reason why i just cant do anything about it i mean there are lots of other reasons but one specific one thats just got me totally messed up and theres absolutely nothing i can do about it. i hate venting to other people so why not do it here? i dunno but im sure i'll feel better hopefully 

im just waiting for the day i actually feel content and happy with myself to come but it hasnt yet so i hope it comes soon