feeling sad, rdr2 be upon ye

I finished my 2nd playthru of rdr2 and started playing cod mw2 but I'm so dogshit at it so I went to start ANOTHER rdr2 playthru..... crazy insane... the overwhelming sense of not belonging and sadness grew so I decided to play it again... its prolly just bc I'm terrible at shooting in cod cuz it don't lock onto targets like in rdr so it's just so weird to me, however with my cousins in Mexico I did tell myself I'd get good at cod sooo who knows...