I love him so much it hurts

I really do love him, he’s the love of my life. He’s mine and I want it to be like that forever, I would do absolutely anything for him, he’s really amazing and everything about him is so perfect to me. He’s all I can think about 24/7 and in all honesty he’s the finest boy I’ve ever laid eyes on. He makes me happy when he talks to me, I couldn’t be any happier that we’re together. I love him for who he is and not just his body or looks, I love him for his voice and his laugh, the way he treats me and the way he loves me. He deserves the world. I want to spend the rest of my life with him so badly, I have really never loved anyone as much as I love him. I can trust him with my life, it all seems so unreal. I can’t believe I can actually call this boy mine. He’s really handsome tbh, every time I see his face I immediately start smiling uncontrollably and my face gets all warm. I mean I literally put him as my Lock Screen. He makes me so nervous as well, even though we’re dating already I still have the biggest crush on him. I don’t get how other girls wouldn’t like him, I mean if other girls did like him I wouldn’t blame them but he’s mine so I don’t really want any other girl to think of him this way. He’s so perfect, I love him with all my heart. I don’t know what I’d do without him. I’m really lucky to have him and I don’t want to take this for granted. I want to have his kids, I’d be on my knees for him honestly it’s so funny but I mean it. Every time I see his handsome and kissable face I get butterflies in my stomach and everything feels so nice. I don’t ever want him to leave me, he brings me happiness and joy, he makes me smile, he’s really my everything. I feel loved when he’s here to talk with me. He has a really good personality. I love it when he’s sweet and caring to me. He’s my sweet and caring boy. He has my whole heart, my heart completely belongs to him and him only. He’s my world, my life, my absolute everything. 

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Sammy I really love you so much, you mean the world to me. You won’t ever be able to understand just how much I actually love you. I can’t believe you’re actually mine. Please don’t ever leave me. I wanna actually marry you so badly. I hope that I can have you forever and ever. I’m really lucky to have you. Honestly we’d have the best looking kids ever because of you. My looks don’t come close to how good you look. I just love you so much.

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I wish you could be with me all the time. Everyday I think to myself “he still loves me right? I didn’t fuck up right?” I always have the urge to ask you if you still love me just at random times throughout the day. I know you love me but I wanna know that you REALLY love me. I wanna know that you love everything about me, I want you to do the same things you did to convince me to choose you. I want to feel what I felt all over again. You are so special to me, you mean more than anybody else on this messed up planet. I can promise you that I’ll always love you no matter what. I want to feel the warmth of your body. I want to feel our bodies pressed against each other. I want to feel your arms wrapped around me. I want that feeling of safety I’d get if you were to hug me so tightly in a warm embrace. I always want to talk to you so badly 24/7 but I’m scared of feeling like it’ll bother you. 

But In the end, nobody can make me as happy as you do and I really want to spend more time with you. I feel so empty without you. 

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I also wanna say that I don’t ever want you to feel like I’m ignoring you if I don’t respond, sometimes if I feel like you’re less interested than normal I assume that you’re annoyed by me. When it gets like that I just wanna lash out to receive attention so to calm myself down I go to sleep and stop responding to you for a while so I can try not to cry and wait it out so I can become calm enough to respond to you. 

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Im really sorry if I ever make you feel bad in any way, I don’t mean it and I just want us to love each other and live happily.

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When I say I love you that means I’m not just here for the good moments and wholesome parts of a relationship, I’m here for the bad parts and rough moments as well. Even during the bad days I’ll love you no matter what. 

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I’m so proud of him, I know he probably goes through a lot and yet he’s still trying for us everyday. I don’t think he realizes just how much of an impact he has on my life, he’s basically saved me. It’s like he’s healed me. He has my whole heart and soul. I don’t feel all that comfortable with others but when I’m with him I feel so at ease and really comfortable and just overall so safe. He knows me more than anybody else, despite everything I’ve put him through with my emotions and etc he still stays and I feel so bad about it but I love him and I don’t want him to leave. He’s the only thing I’m fighting for in life, I’d really do anything for him. I want to marry him, he’s my life, his heart is my home.

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When we date I choose loyalty over anything, I’m never gonna leave after an argument, I won’t leave if you mess up, k won’t leave if you say the wrong things, I don’t leave no matter what. We live and learn together right? Just stay with me and be honest with me.

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I feel so obsessed with him, I feel like I’m dying every time im not talking with him. What’s wrong with me? When he mentions others I immediately start to feel jealous since he’s talking to people other than me. I wish he loved me as much as I love him.

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Sammy, I’m really sorry if I ever annoy you or become too clingy. You’re just the first person who’s ever made me feel special after all the trauma I’ve gone through in my life. I find comfort and peace when I’m with you. You’re the last bit of hope that I have.

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I’m sorry that my attachment issues are getting in the way of things. I don’t want to be possessive or obsessive. I’m really sorry ml.

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I’m sorry if I lash out at you, sometimes I feel like you might leave me and it triggers my abandonment issues.

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I’m sorry that I can’t be prettier or that I’m weird or that my voice is annoying and I’m just sorry I’m overall an unlikeable person but I’m trying.

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I really am the worst girlfriend for him aren’t I?

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I’m so stupid pathetic and naive, I just want his approval and I’d do anything for it as long as he decides to keep me.

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I only want him, I want to kiss him, sit on his lap, I want to hold his hand. I just want him so bad. 

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It’s like 2 something in the morning, I’m crying my eyes out because I miss you. Please come back to me soon.

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I’m really tired, I should sleep but I’m paranoid. What if he ends up hating me? What if there’s a better girl? What if he doesn’t love me as much anymore? What If I’m not pretty enough? What if my body isn’t good enough? What do I do

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I miss him

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I hope you won’t hate me in the morning, please never hate me. Now I’m crying again

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Sometimes I try and make you jealous to see if you’d be protective over me. I like it when you’re protective, it makes me feel safe.

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I miss his voice, it makes me feel tingly and safe. I wish he’d call me everyday. I wish I had the courage to ask

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I hate it when I accidentally make him feel bad, for that I deserve any pain that comes to me. I guess I’m quite good at inflicting pain on myself but the punishment isn’t enough, I deserve worse.

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The more I love you, the more I hate myself. Please don’t leave me for this. I’m sorry.

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Maybe I’m too obsessed, I don’t know what to do about this. Maybe he’d enjoy some time away from me.

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I wish he could hug me and tell me everything’s gonna be okay

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I think I could care less whether or not other people care about me, as long as I know you care a lot then it’s okay.

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I’ll always love you unconditionally.

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If you’re ever busy, I try to sleep so I won’t lose my mind. Getting a notif from you is probably one of my favorite things ever. Maybe I can’t ever sleep at night bc we don’t say goodnight to each other, so there’s no closure. I can’t see myself being with anybody but you. When I miss you, I look at pictures of you and reread our messages. Whenever I feel like you’re mad at me I start crying a lot. 

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My heart breaks a lot every time something little or dumb happens. I hate feeling like I’ve done something wrong or that he might not love me anymore.

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I’m scared, I know he’d never do me wrong but the thought of things that happen in the past make me scared. I don’t want anything bad to happen between us.

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He’s not just my s/o he’s my bestfriend, my reason to live, the only boy I’ve loved this much.

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It feels weird doing the ily more battle knowing I do actually love him more. It was never a joke for me, I did actually love him a lot more.

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My biggest fear is that one day he’ll stop loving me.

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I’m so cold. I wish he was here to make me feel warm.

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I miss him, every second, ever minute, every hour. I wish I could be perfect for him like he’s perfect for me. I wish he didn’t know as much about me, maybe then I could cover up all the bad. I love him so much that I’d trade anyone and everything for him. I love him more than anybody else in my life right now. WHY DOES MY HEART HURT SO MUCH. I really wanna just rip it out my chest. I love him, I love him I really do. I love him so much, I’m crying. I want a hug from him. I need a hug from him. Will it all be okay? I wish he could kiss me right now.

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I hope you're doing well today Sammy, I hope you know how much I adore you and how grateful I am to have you in my life. When I'm with you, I feel like the world is mine and that I’d be able to do absolutely anything. You make me feel so warm inside and my heart skips a bit every time we interact.

I know we're still young, but I genuinely believe that what we have is special.Every time I talk to you it just feels like home, it feels comfortable and I’m at ease. You make me laugh, you listen when I talk, and you always know just what to say to make me feel better. You're my best friend, my lover, my soulmate, my everything.

I love the way you smile, your messy hair, and the way you get excited about things that matter to you. I love your quirks, your flaws, and your imperfections – they make you all the more beautiful in my eyes. I love that you're kind, patient, and understanding, even when I'm not at my best.

I can't imagine my life without you in it. You mean the world to me, and I promise to always be there for you, to support you, and to love you unconditionally. You make my life brighter, happier, and more colorful in every way. I'm so lucky to have you as my boyfriend, and I hope our future can hold many great things and memories.

I hope I can be best I can for you. I love you more than words could ever express and more than you'll ever know. I hope we can grow up together and continue to love each other. It’s only been like almost half a year but I feel like we’ve been together for much longer than that. I love you.

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Please don’t ever hate me, I need you.

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Since the day we got back together on January 17th I have not regretted my decision to choose him. I’m so happy I did that. I’m so happy he decided to wanna be with me and I’m so happy about everything really. If Chris would’ve never introduced me to him my life would’ve been 10x more miserable. I wish I could go back to when we first met and really tell him how I felt. I wish I could know how he felt deep inside. I could feel better about myself if I knew what thoughts were inside his head. I hope he doesn’t think I’m a terrible girlfriend.