life again #1

So it's been 3 months since my last blog, I think I might've lost a bit of interest. Blogging became a thing for me to share impulsive thoughts which wasn't what I wanted to do. Thinking back on all the vent blogs I made I find myself now thinking "why were you sharing personal and traumatic experiences to random people on the internet?" and the answer to that is just I wanted to find someone who related I guess. 

Starting from today I won't be making any more of those types of blogs. 

Soo uhh for the positives

Me and my boyfriend have been in a relationship for almost half a year which is a big thing for me.

I've made more friends.

I passed the 8th grade

I look somewhat better than I did 3 months ago I think

My parents don't bother me as much anymore

I guess maybe overall I'm a bit happier after starting to live the way I wanna live, I call my boyfriend a lot more. It's been basically everyday now and I guess I couldn't do this before was because I felt more nervous about calling and I guess I was scared to because I didn't want my parents or siblings interfere. I feel a bit more free now. To be honest, I think calling with has become my favorite thing now, more specifically when it's only me and him. I wish we could do it more often throughout the day, I end up feeling like I didn't have as much time with him as I wanted. For some reason I get too nervous to ask him to call with me but it's something I often really want. We called for a bit today but then he went to play with his friends which is okay but I wish we had a bit more time yk just me and him. I can't keep him away from his friends lol that'd be pretty mean and possessive and selfish anddd overall unfair so I wouldn't do that even if I really want to, at least for a day but yeah noo I won't do that. He deserves to have fun with friends so I won't disrupt that ofc. I'd be lying if I said it didn't make me a bit sad but I mean overall calling with him has made me a bit better.

More good things are that

I'm not forced to babysit my sister as much anymore which is really good

I'm overall just doing better than before 

These past 3 months have been a lot, feels like it's been longer than that but anyways im good im great im wonderful as of right now i do not wanna die so WOOO HOORAYYY PARTY STREAMERS 

im living <3