awkward

so yesterday, as i said in my previous entry, ive taken an exam. after i finished, i left the exam room and at the same time, this girl Tania left too.

we were silent until one of us said 'hi'. i wanted to talk with Tania, not only because of the awful atmosphere but also because i genuinely havent talk to her for a while. for some background, we used to be best friends but because of multiple reasons (her mom hates me, our old friend group split, she has some new weird friends etc).

since we fell apart last year, her personality changed. she became popular, loud, rly mean. she isnt the tania i used to know. i wonder if she thinks ive changed too... or maybe she had stopped thinking about me a long time ago...

basically sometimes when i look at her i end up asking myself "what happened to us?"

back to the story, i suddenly asked "so how was the exam?" and we had a nice conversation about 3 minutes long. i even found out to which high school she wants to go. tania told me that she wanted to go to a maths & informatics focused high school but IT isnt for her. i said "thats exactly how i feel too" and its true. she didnt ask me about my choice tho...

i felt so happy. was it extremely awkward? yes. but im glad i talked with her. it was like we were best friends again... kinda...

i hope that she doesnt hate me or anything. i hope we can end our relationship as "okay ex-friends", not as "enemies" and if we ever meet some time later, i hope that she wont avoid me but perhaps just acknowledge me in a way, even a simple hello is more than enough for me.