15062023 log

i will try to keep my first blog entry short. 

today was quite a long day, i can't believe this very moment is happening on the same day as the exam i had earlier, it seems so far away. i finally finished my exams today! i think it went pretty well. my anthropology exam on monday went terribly so i will have to retake it...but it was expected so i'm not sad about it.

after my exam i had a phone call with my mom. she seems to enjoy making me feel like every decision i make or opinion i have is wrong and that only she has all the knowledge to make me live a happy and correct life. although i am aware of her manipulative nature i always end up falling into her traps because she is my mother and i am conditioned to go back into her arms every single time. i love her dearly and deeply but she is the cause of all my anxieties...after taking my meds and having a second call with her i felt better and decided to accept a sushi dinner with my boyfriend.

i had been craving sushi for two weeks i was very excited for it. but on the way there we met a few friends who were on their way to dinner, so we joined them instead. we went to a pasta buffet. it was alright, i won't complain about the lack of sushi because there was so much ceasar salad i filled my stomach with it and some pizza and then ice cream for dessert. so good!

i'm back in my dorm room now and although my exams are over i have more anxiety than i have felt in the entire past month...i hope a good night's sleep will help me clear my head from the constant ache i've had all day.

that is all, really. i'll see you next time i feel like writing about my days!