Priorities

What two big turning points in your life do you consider to be the most significant?

Two of the biggest turning points in my life would be when I became a mother for the first time and when we started our business.  For those of you who are not a mother yet, you're in for a rude awakening.  Being a mother is both a blessing and a curse.  As much as I love being a mother, I miss my pre-mom life just as much.  

We talk about the beauty of being a mother, of becoming a mother.  All the bells and whistles that come with it.  But we rarely ever talk about how lonely it is.  You lose all of your closest friends.  You lose your childhood.  You lose your freedom.  Sometimes you even lose your partner.  You are thrown into this entirely new world where your needs, wants and desires no longer exist.  Everything you do, every decision you make will no longer be for yourself.

I was the first amongst the sisters (3 of us) and friends to get pregnant and start a new life.  Being a mother was definitely the biggest turn in my life hands down.  I remember feeling jealous and envious of my sisters.  They still had their freedom.  The money they worked for was spent on themselves.  They want to go somewhere, they just get up, jump in the car and go.  All my friends were no longer mine, they were my sister's. I tell ya, watching them live the life I wanted was heartbreaking.  

I was only 19 years old when I found out I was pregnant.  Had my first child a month before I turned 20.  Don't get me wrong, I love my girls.  I would do anything for them.  But you know when they ask you that silly question "if you could go back and change one thing, what would it be"?   A lot of people would say they'd go back and change this or that but would keep their kids.  I call BS.  If I could go back and change one thing, I would change getting pregnant.  That would mean their father and I wouldn't have stayed together, I wouldn't have had them and I would have never met them.  I am aware of all of that and I am okay with it.  It makes me a little sad but you make the best of your life, no one else does.

I tell my girls, who are now 22, 21 and 18 to live out their lives fully before settling down and having children.  Travel, club, be spontaneous.  There is no rush into getting married and settling down. Being a mother is truly a blessing.  The unconditional love you feel for another human being is unknown until you become a mother.  It is indescribable.  It is beautiful.  But make sure you are doing it at your own pace.

Fast forward 20 years later, through all of our suffering, struggling, living paycheck to paycheck, scraping to get by, we finally became business owners.  Not saying that's the way to go or that starting a business means it will be successful.  There are no guarantees, a risk you have to decide if you want to make or not and if possibly losing everything is worth it.  You need to go into starting a business with the mindset of "there is a possibility it will fail" what is plan b if it does?  Folks, always have a backup plan.  

We are so blessed to have made it this far.  Our business continues to grow and strive in this horrible economy, thank God for that.  The pandemic did not affect our business either.  My thoughts and empathy goes out to the businesses that did not make it.  But remember, as the economy slowly starts to pick up, the demands will be there.  Bounce back if you can.  Take the risk, reopen.  You have my support!

Enough of me, tell me about you.  What are the two biggest turning points in your life?