T___T rant

theres this underclassman (10th grade i believe) of mine whos 6’7 or something at my school who knows 3 languages, plays 13 instruments, all advanced/AP classes, plays football and volleyball, and can sing n everytume ive ran into him I've made a fool of myself and it makes me wanna die a bit inside T_T hes only been in school 3 days and known me for 2 and hes seen me ugly sob (seniors last day of school), ive been accidentally jokingly mean to him at least 2 times (he isnt close enough to joke w yet but i forget a lot), and i think he thinks i hate him T___T i just wanna b friends but i cant when i keep messing up like this :[