i'm trying to get a new job, currently. see my last blog post for the reason why lol. there's this retro movies/video games/anime/etc store near me that i (formerly...) really wanted to work at, because i really love all of those things! so i messaged them twice on instagram. here are the messages: 

(Wed May 17th): Hello! Would you guys happen to be hiring anytime soon?

- no response - 

(Fri May 19th): Really sorry to message again--this will be my last, I promise! I just wanted to add that I have a degree in Japanese as well as Digital/Visual Media and years of retail experience; I really think I would be a perfect fit for a store like this, as I've worked with these types of products for years. If you are hiring or start hiring at some point, I hope you will consider me! Thank you for reading, hope y'all are having a lovely day.

- no response -

i was desperate, okay? but yeah, no response. which i kind of expected, whatever, i was just trying to shoot my shot. so i went on with my life, and sunday, my day off, comes around, and i want to go to the area the retro store is located because i want to get a CD + there's some kind of festival happening! the morning of i get on the train with my boyfriend ready to go, when suddenly, out of nowhere, i get a message from the store...

(Sun May 21st): Hey there,

I am actually down a person today if you’d have time to help out

????????? HUH??????

what the hell does that mean! they literally just wanted me to work a shift for them, apparently! after a few hours of psyching myself up and my boyfriend reassuring me that, since they asked me, they'd be the weird ones in this situation, i went into the store and showed the employee the text messages. and...then i worked a shift there! just like that! 

every time the employee started showing me how to do something i felt guilty, because like, i'm not going to work there, am i? the entire vibe was sort of just....they get people to fill shifts when they need to, but they aren't actually hiring any full-time workers. the owner said as much to me at the end of my "shift" (which i only allowed to be for 3 hours, as it was increasingly obvious this opportunity was not actually going to go anywhere). the employee i worked with was kind, though, if a little intimidating; it seems everyone who works there is in their late 20s or at least 30, which i very much am not.  and there was the omnipresent mood of "oh this guy's going to work one shift and then fuck off," which, even though it was true, makes everything feel a bit pointless. 

i made $57 from it, at least. that's a little over $19/hr, which isn't bad at all. still not entirely sure of the legality of all this but, eh...fuck cops ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ the fact that i got paid did kind of save me from feeling taken advantage of just because i seemed desperate enough (though i don't know how i could truthfully feel that way when i didn't really do all that much in the store, lol). overall my conclusion is that it's a really cool place but requires such an extended, specialized knowledge of every facet of 80s/90s media (from japan and america, it seems) that it would be near impossible for me to do the job well. a customer would ask me about some obscure anime and i'd be like oh cool! haven't heard of that! and that would be all i did all day at work. 

i could put up with that, but the employees mostly work in pairs, i learned, and it would just be too mortifying to do it in front of someone else who probably would know the answer. 

was really experiencing the feeling of "i need to be weirder" described in this post, lol. maybe someday i can have that level of knowledge, but it won't be anytime soon. all the workers at that store seemed to be friends, though, so it would've been weird to intrude upon that, i think. not that they really would've let me; like i said, they weren't looking for full-time workers. sigh. really weird experience! 

i now want a crt tv more than ever, tho.