I hate English - by Ruby

Ok spoiler alert I don't actually hate English, i love it. It's so simple, easy, and almost every piece of media is in english. I will be talking about English class in a different country (here: Germany) and my experiences as an Ausländer

a little backstory here: I moved from Bosnia to Germany at 8 years old, and i could already speak English quite well due to waching YouTube Gamers 24/7 (but that's a topic for a different post lol) I can mimic accents really well, and so I became known among my German classmates as 'that girl who knows English). 

I was really prideful because i could speak english the best and never needed to study vocabulary or Grammar beacause it all came so naturally to me. 

So much of my time is spent on English, all the books i read are English, all the songs i listen to are in English, all of the media i consume is in English. It has become so bad that my THOUGHTS are in English, and the notes on your GERMAN literature are written in english, even though it's my second language and i'm in a completely different country.

You might say it isn't a big problem, but it becomes one once you consider that you've lived in Germany for 6 years and you still can't form grammatically correct sentences, and now every subject is suffering because of it. 

Now imagine you're me: sitting in English class, the only subject you feel comfortable in and the only subject where you can do work in peace, without worrying about bad grades or getting cold-called. and now you finally start writing short analyses and interpretations. You have to write about the atmosphere of a scene with a group, and they decide to make you do it because you're 'that girl who knows English', you get distracted by your classmates and only end up only writing a few sentences. The teacher takes every group's papers and reads it out loud. And yours is the worst one.

Sure you may know lots of different words, you may have the pronounciation of a native speaker, and may be able to speak without thinking first, but you never bothered to learn how to write analyses in english and you barely pass the exams in German.

Now you find yourself embarrassed because you were the one who prided themself in their English, and now you were beaten by the students who only know basic words and expressions. So you cringe because of how much you boasted about your capabilities prior to this.

so what have I learned out out of this experience?: I have learnt to never boast about your skills, and to always stay humble (prayer hand emoji) no but in all seriousness i will be learning how to write school asignments better, and i came to the realisation that i can just write analyses in english and then just translate them into german ?? like i just made everything 10x harder for myself by not doing that.

ok so i think this has been quite dramatic for the first post.. but it's just how i'm feeling rn. but dw i promise i will post some sillier posts in the future :3 

Thank you for reading this much, i hope ya'll liked it even though it was my first real blog post, if you have any questions ask in the comments

love ya XOXO

- Ruby