TLDR: they have a big cultural and religious significance. similar to having "kitsune/kitsuneself" or "wendigo/wendigoself" neopronouns. fae in irish culture? devious little creatures. maniacal. cartoon supervillains, if you will (don't come for me). disrespecting fae = big no-no and they will come for you.
basically im not gonna fw someone ripping on my culture/religion/beliefs for aesthetic fairycore cottagecore pronouns + potentially get jinxed by fae. so whether you believe in them or not, you kind of suck and are pretty uneducated. no i'm not gonna argue with you about it.
fairy is fine. fee is fine. fey is fine. fei is fine. fai is fine. it is LITERALLY. only the spelling fae. they are not synonyms. OTHER NEOPRONOUNS ARE FINE.
hie ok !! just to preface, i am celtic, i am irish. and unlike most people who have opinions on this topic, i am actually practising in my religion & involved culture. wanted to post this because i've gotten messages about it because of my dni (also i'm very passionate about the topic)
i don't have a problem with neopronouns as a whole, it's not my business, do what you want, it doesn't hurt me or anyone else. just these ones.
so first off - what are fae?
fae aren't fairies, they aren't cutesy dainty winged creatures with mystique and love and care who will grant you wishes or some bs. fae are the aos sí, or the fair folk/the good people/daoine sídhe. they are thousands of different creatures, driven away when humans came and took over their land. they aren't gods, but they are extremely powerful beings. they are seen as malevolent but only because we invaded their homes, which they are very protective of. people often leave little offerings (eg. bread, milk, etc) for them to make some sort of peace, so that they don't take anything else ^_^ some are lighthearted, mischievous and good-willed but others not so much and not as forgiving. treat them well and they treat you, but they have the will to be cruel.
a matter of respecting the fae
fae aren't worshipped - like i said, they aren't gods. our gods are the tuatha día/god tribe. but they are definitely respected, and taken seriously. like i said a lot of people leave gifts. "genderfae" and "fae" neopronouns are considered disrespectful for a wide multitude of reasons. disrespectful to the aos sí, because it can be perceived as claiming to be one of them, stealing their identity, being a false idol, etc. they also are genderless, they are above the concept of gender because they existed long before humans made up gender constructs and gender roles.
not only is it disrespectful to fae, but it is disrespectful to people of the cultures that include fae. people use it as some cottage-core fairy-loving pretty aesthetic thing. they just assume it as a "prettier" spelling of fairy. most of the people who use fae neopronouns from what i've seen do not know of the aos sí, the tuatha día, etc. and don't bother to look into it. it's the same thing as a non-japanese person having kit/kitsune neopronouns from japanese folklore or god/godself neopronouns from a religion (same goes for jesus/jesuself, buddha/buddhaself, etc. it's weird! and there shouldn't be an exception because our culture and religion are not as widespread as they used to be and not as taught as they used to be). "not believing in them" isn't an excuse when people go out of their way to respect other cultures and religions, they just feel more content doing it to a less spoken about and well-known culture.
i know there are some irish people who say otherwise, but i have yet to see an active practising person to say that its 100% ok and 100% non-offensive and 100% safe and 100% fair. every practising person i've seen has had a "blah blah blah... but" or flat out don't agree with it at all.
i firmly believe in the difference between seeing a culture, embracing it, respecting it, and cultural appropriation. but even if people did their research, the pronouns themselves could be disrespectful to the fae. and nobody should be speaking for the fae or deciding what is/isn't offensive to them. the only thing we know for sure is that they never took kindly to people stealing their identities or being false idols, or the implication of such. so why?? would we go out of our way to do something that could absolutely be taken that way???
even for people who don't believe in fae folk, it's still just kind of weird. i'm not sure what's so 'coquette' about the culture, and if you want to be a fairy so bad or use fairy-themed/cottage-core pronouns, just. spell it differently. really and truly not that hard.
just as a note: i'm speaking on this as someone from ireland, irish paganism and irish folklore/religion/history/culture/etc. i understand that the concept of fae will change from celt to celt/pagan to pagan/etc, but that doesn't change the baseline of it all, as they ebb and flow similarly across all celtic cultures :] also i feel very strongly about it!! so sorry for being so grr serious about it
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