hugs (and a bit of family)

i dont think i would be so uncomfortabke with hugs if i didnt have boobs. i always think the other person can feel it

it makes me way too aware if my height too. like i dont want ti hate hugging my cousin but it never feels good because hes so much taller than me it makes me feel small and girlish i just wanna be one of thr guys with him. its even harder when my dad is there because my cousin has been friends with my dad since before i was born for he never expects me to want to spend time with them

hugs would also suck less if i wasnt autistic. the problem there is that i never know where ny arms should go and i never know what kind of hug they want. plus my face being so close to theirs makes me feel odd but i dont know if thatd because of autism or bc im aroace