Skateboarding funny moment

I have a fear of rails now....

so ya boy was just vibing, hittin some fuckin 50-50s and board slides on ledges and shit. When all the sudden, a friend of mine comes up to me, and this mf says "Hey you should try the flat rail".

I look at him and I'm just like "Uh, alright". So i do a few 50-50s on it just to warm up, a couple 180s and shit. But then I decide to do a board slide, I messed up a few times and I decided to take a bathroom break.

*Fast forward 5 minutes later*

I come back to the spot and I see my friend holding a big ass piece of wax with the most devious ass expression I've ever seen. So I grab my board and do a board slide on the rail, however. Little did I know, this mf done waxed the shit out of the rail... Like it was literally butter, but not in a good way. Because there was little to no friction, and so i fly the fuck back, I smash my balls on the rail and my board decides to give me a little notice, and so not only had I sacked the rail, but my board came into contact with my balls as well. So I got hit in the same spot twice at max fucking force by the power of not only metal but a whole ass skateboard...

Next thing I know, i fall back onto my head and back right on the damn rail, lemme tell you. My ass had never fell so fucking majestically in my whole goddamn life, it was like i was being lifted into the fuckin heavens. but next thing I know, fuckin *taco bell ding sound effect* on my goddamn head and now im on the ground holding the back of my head and my balls all at the same time while groaning on the floor. I swear to god, I looked like a skate 3 ragdoll on the ground. My ass was dead...