Life updates and other events

Hello,

I have decided to do this little blog about updates and things because it will be out of bulletins and therefore out of the way, and also because I know someone is watching now and they don't have an account so I will make this a blog so that they can see. I have been writing a lot of poetry lately, so that is always fun. I am still applying for jobs (I have an interview woooo). School is starting back up soon and my life has been changing a lot recently.

Fav song recently: Something About Ghosts by Sup, muscles?

p.s. that DnD movie was actually really good imo :O I think you folks should go watch it

I got to hangout with my friends today (we basically just do homework) speaking of school started back up and my bio class already looks intimidating yay! Felt really fuzzy all day, don't really know what that is about. Also I got my interview call but I was driving so I have to call the people back now, but I have an interview!! My friend found some things she liked at the thrift shop and I played some funky murder mystery game XP

side note: To the person I know who is watching, I thought your hair looked really nice put up today and the odd lists you keep of the things we do together is really charming sometimes I wonder what else you keep track of.

Trying to figure out some of my online class business which is interesting and I am still doing homework (fuck me), I didn't get to see my darling today which was sad. I made friends (kinda?) In one of my classes so if I miss notes or smth I can ask them. I got my interview!!! I need another email and then they said they would definitely hire me for summer! A lot of things happened today, it has been very up and down and emotional. Darling seemed like they were doing good which is always nice and left me a note on my car.

Fav Song: Freakin Freak by Dotdotcurve

I totally got the job, waiting for start time and schedules!! I am so happy! Me and Darling got to hangout today which is good but my club got canceled :( I am also trying to think more about what my current relationships with people mean to me? That ever happen to you? Like I really want to try and put my friends first in my life but school gets so busy and I do love them a lot but it is hard to connect when the quarter is starting and everything is so fast. Prom season is coming up and I am totally going to someone's school so I can actually like go to a prom lol! AH! Also Darling got me a lemon mug! It is so fucking cute, they said they had a matching one too? It's awesome.

p.s. Life is going to be okay, when everything feels like shit you need to get up and fight because sometimes the very act of living is a rebellion, please keep yourselves safe I know the world is not too kind to those it doesn't like.

The color changed deal with it. The person i was sitting next to in one of my classes got dropped from the class :( and also after my class somebody asked me out? Which is really flattering, I had to turn them down of course which is the first time I've had to do that. Makes me wonder what people think of me? Like for someone who has not spoken to me once to ask me out? I must be attractive or interesting somehow right? Just hard to think of myself that way. I got caught up with my classes and stuff and I am actually ahead at the moment which is sick. Not as hard as I thought it was gonna be, I think I just psyched myself out too much.

Fav song today was Destroya (it played in the car like 5 times while I was driving lol)

Today did not start well, I woke up at 3am and kept throwing up and my stomach hurt really bad so that was not fun. My only class today was online so at least I will not fall behind. I did not get a lot of sleep obviously haha, also I don't have a fever so I'm guessing maybe I ate something out of date? But the only thing I ate yesterday was toast and two pb&j sandwiches which are things I eat often so I have no clue what is going on. Still feeling pretty nauseous. Hopefully it goes away before the weekend is over :( 

P.s. Do you know how hard it is to focus on an online class when you feel like your gonna die? Lmao, my poor teacher probably thinks I'm stupid. I promise I know the Spanish I am just feeling shitty. Also enjoy my shitty poem

Put my heart is dissection,

Make me your perfect boy,

Sliced to perfection,

I want to be your favorite toy.

Please hurt me, make me bleed,

Darling don't be coy,

I promise to follow your lead,

My world is yours to destroy.

Hi! I honestly did not do a lot today, someone came over to look at maybe putting in a new gate for my dog because the little pupper keeps finding ways to get past it and he isn't really allowed to be on the carpet. I got ahead in some classes while talking to Darling. We were talking about how it is prom season and if we were going to a dance and what we would wear, all fun things. They tried to be nice about me struggling with some math concepts but they are much smarter than me when it comes to that so it is not much help lol

I still haven't found out what made me puke but I cleaned my bedsheets and my room and cleaned the tea kettle and checked the creamer and milk so maybe my body just hated me lmao all better now though!

Fav song atm: Self Medicated by Cheap Shot (I find myself coming back to his songs every once in a while)

Easter!! I did quite a bit today! I went out to see my grandma and eat lunch with my uncle's family. It is kind of sad going out there sometimes because I know that my grandma doesn't really know who I am (she has memory issues) but she is doing really well in the care facility she spends most of her time at so that is good. We had tacos which is not really a holiday food but I was happy about that because I am really picky. My parents got me an Easter basket which was very kind. This might be a bit rant-y now that I think about it but it is really hard sometimes to really love and be loved by people you don't agree with at all on some things. I absolutely love my parents but disagree with a lot of their ideas of the world and it is weird to think about the fact there are things I can never tell them because they don't deserve that y'know? Anyways end of that. My brother said he wasn't doing much but it was nice to message him for a bit, he liked his basket although it took a few more hours to get to his place than expected. I am getting a lot more into Minecraft again so I will probably be doing that for awhile.

p.s. Remember to tell the people you care about that you love them.

Hello!!! This update is a few days late cause my day was busy yesterday!! I went to class and Darling gave me a very sweet note and a poem, then I went home and my friends came over. We were suppose to be doing homework but we just could not focus so we went and bought snacks and lost our damn minds so some reason, at some point I started laughing so hard I was sobbing so that was interesting! After they left I still had all my homework to do! I had to get it all done in like 3 hours because it was all due at midnight but it is okay because I totally pulled it off XD I mean college is made for doing dumb shit with friends right? I still need to go shopping for formal clothes but I really don't want to, formal clothes shopping is like my least favorite activity.

 Fav song: Dance Dance by FOB ( I honestly can't explain this one today)

I went to class and I got to hang out with Darling afterward, we were studying. I actually got all of my shit done while I was with them haha. He let me paint his nails afterward. It was raining like really bad yesterday but not for long and not while I was outside so that is always nice. I got all of my workshop for class done early so that was nice! I am also getting to know the girl sitting across from me really well and I think we could be friends! I fell asleep like really early and didn't really eat anything but that is okay, I'll start focusing on taking care of myself more.

Fav song today: Crowquill by Circle Takes the Square (This song makes me really emotional in a way I can't really explain, it feels very religious, that probably sounds really stupid but oh well) 

Hello people!! I am here to tell you about my amazing life! So Darling got me hot cocoa today which was really fucking sweet of him and it was very yummy :P Really want to get him something now but I can't think of anything at the moment. My jobs training stuff is soon so I have to mentally prepare for that! I made a fun little quiz for my friends and they got really competitive lmao. The engineering club finally met up again and I am getting convinced to join the table top gaming club as well haha. I get to know today if Darling can come to the dance with me so that will be fun. I also set a time limit on my phone for tiktok because it was kind of consuming my life and making it really hard to focus on literally anything so I am going to slowly make the time less and less and eventually just use it for when my friends send me stuff, my brain was really not meant to handle all of that lol, kind of why I came to this site y'know? To get away from standard brain killing socials, and I do really think I will be here more for that type of stuff.

P.s. Guard your peace carefully, I promise you walking out of bad situations doesn't make you weak, I love you.

I didn't do a lot today, I just had class. I woke up a bit late but that is okay! I am suppose to find out today whether darling can come to prom or not which will be fun :P I am getting my plans and shit hammered out for that. I am really trying to start taking care of my looks and stuff for prom, like actually doing skin care and maybe start working out? I only have two weeks but oh well. I think I might have to wear a dress to prom which is pretty eh, I really don't want to but hey I'm gonna wear blue either way! Thanks to my friends for deciding that for me, (don't actually know if I will but I will try). 

P.s. You should watch the sunset today 

HOLY SHIT Darling can go!!! I am so fucking happy about this y'all don't even understand. I am kind of nervous because I have never had to introduce a partner to my friends before? So like this will be weird but so fun! Other than that not much else happened today, I had a class with darling but that was about it.

p.s. The world is designed to make you miserable, find things and people that make you happy despite it.

I went to the mall and got my prom outfit after like HOURS of looking and I know that's really not that much but I went to 2 different malls and a store so I mean it really took a lot out of me. The people on here and my irl friends thought I looked really epic so I am very happy about that. My friends also convinced me to wear a top hat lmao. I will definitely be in the theme I guess lol. Me and my friends have prom plans all set out and also darling can totally come to our little prom hangout before hand which is literally so awesome (Again still really nervous cause boyfriend and friends meeting each other is a bit weird)

p.s. I love you interesting little internet people   

I went back to the mall for shoes today and also I went to go drop off paperwork I thought I didn't have but I went and they told me I totally had it so I was a bit pissed lol. I came home and messaged my friends for a bit and I still have homework but I don't want to do it until I eat something because I haven't eaten yet today but it just seems like so much work right now and I am kinda overwhelmed haha, my hat comes in tomorrow which is gonna be so epic and I will get to send pictures and epic cool stuff. 

Fav song rn: Filthy White Tee by The Velvet Youth 

I got to see Darling today in class <3 I also got to see my other friends who normally come over on Mondays. We did some homework and then went to get Panera, we also called Darling and they seemed to get along pretty well which is good cause that means they will get along at prom! I got my hat today but it was too small :( I also got my nails done (press ons) and I have never done press ons before I have only ever painted them and let me tell you I do not understand how women will keep these on for so long because I cannot do shit LMAO, also I think I may have caused Darlings parents to get mad at them because they got told off for staying up too late (sorry love) anyways they are not allowed to have their phone after 9pm :( I have an interview for a place that pays more than my current place I am training for! So I will have a busy weekend :P

p.s. Find art in the places it shouldn't exist, make the terrible bearable. 

I got a food handler's card today (for work related reasons) and went to class, we tested water samples! Woooo Darling left a note on my car which was really sweet. I had some homework today and wrote some kick ass poetry (I hope) just mainly spent the day with my own thoughts n stuff. This weekend is going to be very busy and so will this week, I am not prepared for the end of the year at all.

p.s. Go give your pets some pats 4 me

Hello! I got to see Darling today and I gave them a book that I really liked and it isn't their usual type of book so I am really hoping that they will enjoy it. I got my hat today!! (The correct size lol) so the prom fit is ready to go, ill just where my red studs and do a little bit of makeup, I think I am going to look so handsome. I also totally skipped on club today because I was hanging out with Darling and their sister. OH! and Darling totally doesn't have a prom fit yet but that's ok because whatever they choose is gonna be awesome (except for jeans I really hope you were joking about that love). I keep chewing on my nails so they kinda look fucky now but I have to take them off for something in a few days anyways, also Darling said they were going to talk to their dad about maybe having him meet me this weekend? I am not prepared to meet my partner's parents, that sounds like really fucking scary especially since Darling said that their parents hadn't really met someone with the same style as me before, I just really want to make a good impression. Well anyways my day wasn't that interesting, I'm going to go shower and then do coursework.

p.s. Danger days is such a summer track and so is Louder Now by TBS I do not care what anyone says.

Okay I totally like forgot the last few days existed oops, but Darling bought a prom outfit (they look very handsome) and my parents got my brother a car so he can work when he comes back from his college and it is like a really sick car. I honestly kind of forgot what has happened in the past few days. I did my stuff for my job so that I could get onboarded n stuff and messaged them about smth but they haven't responded. That's about

I got to see darling again today and my friends came over (Mondays are the best) my week is about to be really fucking busy. Well the next few weeks will be busy in general. I have two proms that I am taking two different people to. I have "emo prom" which I am taking Kat to because she likes that type of music more and getting Darling to go to more than one prom is a big ask then I am taking Darling to normal prom because I love them duh and then the next weekend I am going to a Uni visit (wooo!) then when summer-ish time I am going to two different concerts (Gary Numan and NOFX) so like I have a lot on my plate for the upcoming days. Anyways thats all I have for today!