¿¿50 pages I crave??

I need a lover who will also write a 50 page report about when,where,and why they loved me 2. 

I mean that is a lot of pages, maybe just 3 would be fine. Although 50 pages would impress me a lot. I sound highly delusional right. And honestly I am delusional way more than I thought. Even though I'm asking for someone random to just come out of nowhere and confess there dying love for me. Which will never happen obviously. I'm just saying that because the voices inside my head keep reminding me how this world has no lover left for me,no panther that will take me. But then again I don't even try to find one. The attention and love I crave so badly from one person will never happen not unless it's from fake scenes I make up. Even God agrees with me on this one.