This is a little snippet of my OC Reo Ito
(my boyfriend fixed it up so thank him for making it sounds good)
TW blood and stuff ok
I have ever felt this much suffering and agony before. I mean, I've felt pain. Everyone has - mental or physical, we’ve all felt it. Falling over, bad breakup, that kind of stuff. But right now, physically and mentally, every atom in my brain, my body, even my fucking soul feels like it's being seized apart. My mental pain is odd to say the least. I feel embarrassed and ashamed, but also... Betrayed. Not to the person that hurt me, or the people that helped them do it, but betrayed that the world let this happen - a so-called God let this happen. They let them hurt me. I have been told my whole life about karma. “Do something good, and you will receive good in return.” But this isn’t good. I haven’t done anything wrong. Unless just being me is wrong? What's wrong with my own thoughts what’s wrong? I've never seen so much blood before, let alone my own. I can’t see out of my right eye. I can’t even feel it. My face is wet, slick with fresh blood. It's warm, oozing, and absolutely gut wrenching. That same feeling covers my neck, dripping and searing with agony. My neck stings. Deep gashes to the sides of my neck, along with a few cuts over the rest of my body - but the slits on my neck are the worst of it. I hope. Laying here, aching, dizzy, and barely able to move, I find enough willpower to weakly lift my arm. I raise my hand over my head, blocking the sunlight. My hand is covered in blood after touching my face. Small clots cling to my fingertips, drying in the sun. I'm scared. I'm terrified. This is it. I’m going to die here. My body will slowly become cold, and like a doll, my skin will shatter. It will erode into dust, and no one will ever look back. No one will ever know what happened here. Who knows? They all might think I tried to kill myself. I wish I did. I wish my death didn’t come to me in a way like this. I don’t want to die by anyone’s hands but my own. I’ll never know what would have become of me. All I will be is just a kid that died a little earlier than others would have. I just want it to go to black. Maybe I can redo this. Maybe I can have another go at this. Like a game, restart at a checkpoint. But this is real. I’m too tired to think. I'm too tired to breathe. Laying in a warm red ocean, praying to a God I have no faith in that somebody, anybody will take me, save me - so I can become something before I decay into nothing.