About Zoey S(eeks)

Hey, guyz!!! I wanna explain something, so why not 4 my first blog???

So, as u all know, my display name is Zoey S. Or z03y_s33ks. But it wasn't always that. And I wanna give some backstory on the change and the whole thing in general!!!

TW FOR S*ICIDAL THOUGHTS

But back to the main story, that paper was from months ago, I think from December. Well, one day I sat at my desk and checked to make sure it was clean and found the paper with my dead named signed at the top and I realized "Oh! This is the paper I almost used but we used Cinnamon's instead" and I saw the cat. And right beside it, it said "KYS" with an arrow pointing to my preferred name. And I just... sat there. Staring at it. These three stupid letters ruined my mood instantly.

So, basically, I was off, and my teacher [amazing guy], noticed something was off. So he came over and asked what was wrong, and I showed him the paper. His response was "Oh.. Do you need to go to the bathroom for a bit? Or need to stand in the hallway? Take a breather?" And I said no, I just couldn't move. I felt tears in my eyes, I didn't want everypony to notice me cry if I stood up. So he asked me if I needed to write about it. I told him I lost my notebook at my mom's, the one he gave me for my feelings and worries, so he left to his desk. He came back with a notebook, ripped out the first page that was written on, and gave it to me. On the cover, it said "Zoey S".

He said, "Here, you can use this. I don't have a blank one, but you can turn this into a character. I have so many of these books so just tell me whenever you need another one"

And it felt amazing. I wrote about what happened and how I actually... wish that I was brave enough to end my life. I had attempted years ago, but I chickened out. And it ruined my family too because I'm a selfish idiot. But anyways, I wrote about it. And drew me at the bottom. But then I decided to take the Zoey thing into consideration. I took out my small pack of crayons that my mom got me for whenever Im switching between houses or we're out and I can't bring my big crayons. I drew the first thing that came to mind and filled in the face except for one eye because I still want some form of emotion. And eyes produce tears.

So I finished them, and I turned to my classmate [lets call him rapunzel because hes bald] and told him to pick a color. He said blue. I pulled out a few crayons and told him to pick a shade and he picked cerulean. So i used that for the hair and added black roots to it and the twintails. And then colored the shirt black, added some accessories to the arms, and bam. Zoey was born.

And it was so easy to hide my pain behind Zoey. Nopony knows that Zoey is me. Only I and my teacher do. It was, surprisingly, easier to draw Zoey and then write about whatever issued me. And then I would just feel like it was a character on its own. Not my pathetic issues. If that makes any sense.

My only complaint is because "Rapunzel" picked blue, which I like, but now ponies keep comparing Zoey to Sal Fisher, but I have no intent on changing the hair color. I came up with the design before the color and rapunzel hadn't even seen the drawing, so I know he didn't mean harm. But it's frustrating playing PonyTown or something and being called a Sal Fisher rip off or something. Or ponies assuming I'm a Sally Face account. I don't know.

But that's probably something dramatic to get upset over. But anyways, thank you for reading this if you did, sorry you had to sit through my dumb rant. But that's the backstory behind my name. Obviously the only downside is that Zoey is a feminine name and I HATE she/her pronouns, but I'm too scared to put my pronouns in my bio because I might get bullied. That's it, until next time, stay safe, X Y and Z's

Edit: Forgot some info!!! I also changed it on here because I wanted a new start online. The style was an emo art style so I thought it would be fitting if I came back in hopes of making friends, so I changed things up, ehehe