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So I'm the president of the biggest LGBTQ+ social organization on my campus, which is already regarded as one of the most queer-friendly campuses in the South, and it forces me to deal with so much responsibility and so much stupidness. Just had someone freak out because they were lashing out at people on our Discord so we timed them out for an hour. An HOUR! I don't even wanna spend more than an hour on Discord a day! And people just keep acting stupid, and I always try to play polite because I'm in charge, even though people always catastrophize and seem to perceive and act like me and my team are evil and malicious. We're literally just like, 6 college students trying to put together an inclusive space for queer ppl on campus. It's negatively affected my mental health! I now fear everyone in my life is perceiving me as the worst version of myself, and my actions as malicious.
Elections are in a month and I'm not running again, so at least there's that, lol. I'm proud of the work I've done but it made me burn out the worst I ever have. Activist burnout is real!
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milarkaz
Sounds stressful, people will always be aggressive and blow things out of proportion, you can only deal with it diplomatically and get over it. Best of luck, the best/worst versions of yourself will always be different to different people, and you can't really change that. I used to care a lot but I'm learning to be the best or improved version of myself for myself. Mental health is always a priority, take care!
Yeah I already struggle with conflict a little bit, for a long time I "dealt" with it by just becoming really good at de-escalation and conflict resolution so I could avoid conflict as much as possible, which is good in some regards, don't get me wrong, just I will react really poorly when there's no avoiding it. I've also been super mild-tempered for a long time, being the "bigger person" at all times, pretending all is well for the benefit of the other person, but especially after the total burnout I faced I realized maybe I *want* to be mad. Maybe I deserve to be mad! Not even always externally, but just being able to say to myself "that person was a dick. This fucking sucks." It feels like it'll help me stop caring as much about how everyone perceives me.
by chasey; ; Report
Yeah you're right, good point on wanting to be mad! It's like a form of anger management, if you let it out instead of bottling it's great
by milarkaz; ; Report