coffee stained sweater sleeve

do you tell me you love me just to hear someone say it to you? im sorry for the way my hands start to shake when you ask how im doing, i dont have to heart to tell you ill be dead by tomorrow. i dont think i have the heart to admit it to myself either. im sorry for the late nights and early mornings that start and end with sobbing, screaming and pulling out hair. im sorry for all the things i say. 15 years of bullshiting my way through life finally caught up to me and its making me tired. its tiring being a cigarette burn on a pretty white wrist.