hi

oh hi. its again been a while. past few months have been, idk really. i read my old entry's and i feel like I've just changed completely again. i doubt anyone reads these but here's some things going on.

the last time i made an entry 5sos5 by 5 seconds of summer came out, considering how much that album means to me now i find that interesting. i don't really remember what i was doing 6 months ago to be honest. i remember new years being a big turning point for me and definitely a reflection of how these past few months would go. on new years i was sick by myself, in the early morning of January 1st i listened to some music, mostly "when facing the things we turn away from" by Luke Hemmings and "superbloom" by Ashton Irwin, which are my two favorite albums now. I've casually listened to 5sos on and off since 2014, as a 1D fan that's no surprise. in 2019 ghost of you by 5sos was one of my favorite songs, it helped me a lot and i thought it was like the saddest song I've ever heard and in 2014 she looks so perfect was everything to me, like that song has RULED my life since day one. in early 2022 i got back into 1D after pretending i didn't like them all 2021 because i thought as as a scene kid I'd get called a poser for liking them, which meant i would get back into 5sos cuz for a lot of people 5sos and 1D go hand in hand. i was listening to them a lot in 2022 but in late December and July they became the forefront of my attention, learning their discography top to bottom and that's also when i found Luke's album. Luke's album changed my life, I've never related to an album or a person more, it found me right when i needed it, that whole band did. my favorite in the band has changed from Calum to Luke to Ashton over the years but since i got back into them its 100% been Ashton, he means the world and more, he is comfort as a human, his album superbloom is also extremely important to me, with tracks like "skinny skinny", "drive", "matter of time" and "greyhound" its a very relatable and comforting album. i wish i could get the lyrics of drive tattooed on me forever. with some of 5sos songs like jet black heart, moodswings, redline, caramel, the girl who cried wolf, invisible, tears, and more, 5sos has quickly became my favorite band. every member means the world to me, every song, every album, they've been the one thing that makes me happy in one of the darkest times of my life and i'll never be able to thank them enough for that. they're all i talk about but they truly are everything and more to me.

i know i said it was meant to be a life update but really, i just don't wanna talk about my life. all i can say is 16 shouldn't be as hyped up as it is. i should say, I'm working on music rn, i hope to put out some in the next few months so look out for that, it would mean a lot.