Something I dont tell most people.

Middle School is stupid I think almost everyone can agree on that, it's the time when people are most vulnerable and are trying to figure out who they are. Middle school was hard for me, but I had it better than most. 6th grade is my cringiest memory of it all I was trying so many new things and my clothing style was less than good. It's hard to recall all of my friends from back then but I've been painfully reminded of one thing, my hair. It is a point of contention for geonitro to point out that I shaved half of my hair off during 5th grade and it passed on into 6th grade. It's funny because I don't think people realize I received some not-so-subtle bullying for my hair.

In 7th grade, we just got off of online learning and everyone looks completely different, you have that awkward stage where you need to do actual work. My clothing style got slightly better, but on the first day of school, someone asked if I was a teacher so -_-. The rest of the year was kinda mid and nothing important really happened.

8th grade was the worst year my acne got really bad during this year and during the middle of the year (I have spoken quite a bit about this but I just need a place to voice it) Two of my very best friends liked to tease me and taunt me as this big elaborate game it would start off as one thing and then move on to just straight bothering me and harassing me. One of the "offenders" apologized but to me, those scars and traumatic memories have never left. Now when I talk and accidentally say something crude or to someone else that may sound like an innuendo I immediately stop and rephrase what I'm trying to say. I had many nights where I would try and figure out how to get them to stop and go over everything they did that hurt me and find a way to forgive them which I did time and time again. Now all of that doesn't sound like something to fuss over or hold a grudge against but I took it as beat-around-the-bush bullying. I have decided that I'm no longer going to forgive people like that. The second "offender" they have yet to apologize I have also cut that person out of my life because I could not take the feeling that they might start bulling me again so I told them to fuck off. I want to end the fear of how they treated me so I don't sound like a broken record.

I would really like to forget it all but you know you can't