IM SO MAD RN!!! 🤬 Someone HELP!!!!

I miss my boyfriend smm!!! 😢 I know I was just talking to him 35 mins ago, but he was farming bosses and wtv on genshin for Shenhe!!! So I said I'd leave him alone and NOW I WANNA KMS!!! I can't not talk to him... I'm on the verge of losing my sanity, I've written two pages off in my Journal, I've listened to idk how much songs now, I've done absolutely nothing within the last 36 mins, and I threw one of my favorite Stuffed animals across my room out of anger!! 🤬 LIKE HOW DARE I??? LIKE IM NOT EVEN MAD!!! idk what I'm feeling, I think it's just idk 😓 I'm going through a durastic mood change rn!!! Someone help me or I just might throw a temper tantrum!! ITS BEEN 38 minutes I can't do this anymore I swear, BUT I SAID ID LEAVE HIM ALONE!!!! WTH DO I MEAN "ILL LEAVE YOU TO DO THAT THEN!!!" WHAT WAS I TRYING TO ACHIEVE?!??! LIKE I DON'T GET A FIRST PLACE RIBBON FOR "Dumbest bitch of the month!!!" LIKE NO IF I WANTED TO SPEAK W HIM I SHOULD'VE JUST SAID THAT!!!!! 🤬🤬🤬 WHY DID I DO THIS TO MYSELF!!! 40 MINUTES AGO, I would've been listening to LOVE SONGS!!!! now I'm hear Listening to the most depressing stuff I have from a year ago!!!!!! I hope this is entertaining bc girly pop I'm so close to a fucking mental break down bc wth do I do this to myself?!?!?;?! What makes me think I can just do THAT, and my poor boyfriend 😢 Like I just left him like that!!! I feel so bad!!! (Idk if he's feeling Half as bad as me rn) BUT STILL!!! He deserved to have himself known that I'd talk to him later when hes done his farming BUT INSTEAD I SAID ID LEAVE HIM TO DO IT?!?!?! IK IM JUST REPEATING STUFF NOW BUT IM A SRS PAIN IN THE ASS LIKE IF I WASNT ME, ID THROW MYSELF INTO A DITCH!!! anyways Ty 😘 no one has to read this sorry girly pops!!! I'm gonna go mind my business now!!! BYEEE!!!