laid off

got let go from a job i expected to have for the rest of my life, really. it was kind of a once in a lifetime opportunity and now im stuck with nothing and unable to go back to school because all scholarship deadlines have passed for most things. there's a chance i can get the job back as they rebuild, but to see that the industry is so... futile? that i could just be let go at any moment is extremely worrying. i can't even get unemployment because i'm autistic and get extremely overwhelmed at "regular" jobs (you have to "actively apply" for jobs in both my states) and my other passion requires a degree i abandoned at the halfway mark.

there were around 100-200 other people who got laid off. many who'd been working there for half the company's lifespan... and I think most of them were blindsided by this. (i'd been warned by my boss)... I can't imagine how they feel... for me it's like... well at least I like other things, but some of them... this is what they do... what they went to school for... some have kids...

i was two days from moving 12 hours from home for this job... thank god they did it when they did or my dad would've done something drastic. i haven't seen him this mad in a while about something. i really felt like he and i were in our joel and ellie era because i genuinely think he was about to send some guys to beat up the execs

anyways........... guess i've got some free time to read some books i bought a couple weeks ago