Michael, get me weed and I'll stay for longer

I love the taste of cannabis on your lips and tongue. The smoke warms our lungs, I hope it can melt your icy heart.

Do you love me? Holding me down, breathing into my mouth, I'm breathing into yours. I think about you and my arms and hands buzz, my heart skips and I like that this isn't love. I thought I heard you say it was but you asked 'want me to fuck you all night long?' I forgot what I'm supposed to be, where I should be, then you walk me to my car in the cold, squeeze my waist in a hug and I wish I could be in your bed again. The cold must've frozen what I thought a joint could warm. Maybe next time I'll get you so high we both forget that you're not supposed to kiss me and hold me like you do, you should be married and I should be eighteen.

I traced my blue fingertips over your scorpion tattoo and your head lay buried between my chin and collarbones. I could feel your warm breath. I want to get you drunk, I want you to get me drunk. Lay my shyness aside like a dirty plate, let us finish talking, and kissing and fucking, then I'll take it to the sink and wash it off and store it back in my ribcage. My body rattles and I'm avoiding eye contact again.

Ask me about school and I'll ask about work. Doesn't it bother you? This honeymoon won't last forever. You'll get a wife and I'll go to university and you'll forget about me but I'll always feel like a bad person. You're just a man and I hate you for it. Care about me, please hurt when you think of me crying and alone.