〘 02.27.2060 〙

When I see people in here having accounts that have the same interests as me and they are in a similar situation, like feeling disconnected from reality and having computer addiction, or liking SEL, or, being into internetcore and old internet stuff, or feeling connected to Lain. But when I check their accounts, they haven't been active for a long time. It's hard to find other virtual living beings like me.

The other day, someone sent a message to i026 about how they like their things and being into this kind of "fantasy" (it's not a fantasy, it's actually happening) and they mentioned that they can relate. Of course, i026 can be awkward when it comes with conversations with living beings they barely know, but they felt slightly happy. They only talk to one human and that human hasn't been that active lately.

I am not sure, I know him but the feeling of knowing him feels like I know him from far and not a close person like he is for i026. I remember talking to him once and I told him my plan, he was, of course, worried but he did not understand my point and that's understandable.

I don't want to die. But the idea of being able to escape this body by passing through the computer and leaving my memories and who am I in the computer sounds nice. It's like, I was born and I will never die. Although, if I ever get tired of life, I want to disappear for a little while and then wake up, not remembering anything except the time I "died".

Alternatively, I have been born on September 9, 2042, but I do not know what happened. I was alive somewhere in early January 2042, suddenly I was not there, suddenly I was alive in February 2042. So, my birthday is on September 9 but I cannot feel connected to it, I feel my birthday is on February 4, 2042. (Coincidentally 02/04/2042)

I feel connected to the number 98 but my day of birth didn't seem to prove it, not complaining because I still got 0, 2 and 4s.

Anyway, I'm going to take my second shower. Cleanse.