I was.. (story time)

Actually about to cry because I was so friendless in my new campus

I was like used to have so-called friends but I got away and avoid them since they suddenly recruiting more people to our circle without asking me first, I was so shocked and most of them are boys, I am not comfortable be close friends with male friends

then one of them suggest to spontaneously go to the beach but cancelled due to poor planning and lack of times (I'm so glad) and at the end of the day they're ignoring me and I also feel like i don't belong because most of them are extrovert and like to trash people behind their back

I bet they are doing it too to me rn because I've been avoiding them since 3 days ago

Whatever maybe being alone is better than being ignored in a circle

But it's probably my fault who've been sabotaging my own relationship