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Category: Life

[Journaling](Day 29) I do not exist.

It would be an understatement to say I feel like not writing this one but here I go. I only do this because if I stop out of laziness I won't come back.

It's Saturday, which means there is no better day to loathe myself. Except maybe Sunday.

I have a week of exams starting on Monday. Do you wanna know what I worked on today? NOTHING.

I didn't even play a thing today.

I just... Got nowhere.

Talking with people on discord.

Beating myself up over how stupid I am.

Hey look, what's that on the horizon?

Oh, that was just a mirror. This day just got a little worse.

Oh boy, would you look at that? A怌š“”š“®š“µš“Ŗš“¹š“¼š“®ć€. yayy

Fun times!!! I have to be careful with my blood.

I hate myself and everything that reminds me of myself. Every picture of me should burn. Every word I've written should be erased. And it's all meaningless in this vast uncaring universe.

Do I have a chance? Of course, I don't. Will I keep trying? Eh.
Hard to call this "trying". It's just jumping off a bridge because, like a lemming, I'm not programmed to turn around.

This day brought me so much pain. So much pain. So much pain.

It is bloody and exhausted that I end this post. I have naught to say. Save me. Help me.

Good night, lone reader. Please save me from myself.

The doctor says I'm headed for destruction
Can I fucking live?

I'm like a time bomb ticking in your head
Paranoia clouding your judgement
And no matter what you do about it, about it, about it - Paranoia, A Day To Remember

Laporte, signing off. We're almost there.

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