26/1/2023--pretentious artest

i like to thing i wright n a empatheteic and poeting way but really its just pretencos bullshit much better suted to a privet book but insted i lay out my insides on THE WORLD WIDE WEB (taadaa) in a desprate attenpt to find some sort of relatablility. not to be a me agaents us bitch but who coud relate to me. you dont find alot of patholgical liers who want to kill people but also outset themslef to be dainty damged girls. yes palalogical lyer yes ill admiting right know on a blog post thats nobody reads that i am a great lyer and have fin doing it, for sure its somthinng i want to stop and mabey im a raging narcisist......im like 95 sure im a raging narcisit i know im better and more tallented then your avarage go blow and i have constet thoughts saying............how did they not like me, im stupid talented, give out so much love, and im fucking gorgous at that. i dont expect normal people to relate to me and thats somthing im coming to terms with. nobody around me as ever know me like i know them, there is nobody in my life that i havent created a wild lie to keep the attention on me to the point where it has become nacisitic abuse. nobody sould have to put in a consios thought to not abuse peole but i do it every day if my life. i relised why i abused my ex girlfrend, she was abusing me to be fair but you cant repoet my kind of abuse to the cops, sometimes i miss how much i could fuck with him, he took every peace of insanity i gave him for alsoet 3 years and to that day i still miss him for that, i dont miss him, even when we where dating i thought he was butt fuking ugly and horrably boring but he alwase put his neck out for me, my current gf is great she really is but shes mean to me alot and im constently scred shes ging to find someone better, edgyer, with a higher sex drive. she has had millons of experances i havent and shes so ahhed of me socaly witch means that we arnt experancing things at the same time. as much as i love her i know she isent the one, she crittisises me constantly and we have almsot nothing alike, but i guess it will do for now, wow i sould like such a twat