Doctors are confusing

Why do doctors have such confusing names? i am a very simple woman and I like knowing what I'm getting myself into. Lets start with the easy ones: pediatrist=Feet doctor, Dentist=Teeth doctor, Optometrist=Eye doctor, and so on... A primary care physician should be like "General doctor" or "Ordinary doctor". A Nurse, which is already a simple name, should become "HDHH" which is more like a sound. It stands for Handy Dandy Helpful Human. This is my favorite one, A phlebotomist should be a "Blood Sucker" and in order to communicate they just make slurping noises at each other. A Hematologist should be called the "King of the Blood Suckers" or maybe, "The all-knowing teacher of the Blood Suckers", sounds very mystic, I like it. An Oncologist should obviously have a really cool and menacing name so they scare the cancer away, something like: "Cancer Warriors" or "The destroyers of cancer", Already such a better name! And gynecologists and Urologists would obviously become "Private I's" 😏

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