iGot Involved in Celebrity Drama

the title is a hint as to who the celebrity is, but i wont be naming names...

the other day, my school hosted a book talk for a former actor who just recently had success with their memoir (that has an eye catching title). tickets were free, so of course i went... i was excited because even though i had not read the book, i'd heard good things about it so i was delighted to see this individual in person. well, i got there about an hour and a half before it started and already, it was very disorganized. they had us queue up on the stairwell, which if you are unfamiliar, is a safety hazard. then, they had us move outside because of the safety hazard the stairwell posed, but i said no siree bob and stayed my tiny ass inside. i freeze easily!!! it was student led--the organization hosting the event--so i let it go. 

moving on, the event started, and it was moderated by some grad student of social work. i didn't mind, i just hoped the conversation would go smoothly. (spoiler: it didn't!!!)

the celebrity came out, and i could already tell they were very lovely. i was very excited, so i had high hopes, and what could go wrong with a student moderating? (spoiler #2: everything!!!) the conversation started off pretty mild, the moderator was cracking jokes and talking about themselves way too often for my liking, but i was like maybe they're nervous. soon, my theory was proven true. they said point blank that they were very nervous and so i gave them a pass. if it were only that, i wouldn't be making this post, but alas, chaos ensues...

we start to shift into darker themes that are present within the book, and warnings were given for the topics. i didn't need them but i thought i'd note they were acknowledged. unfortunately, there was no real transition into this, and the moderator thought it would be funny to transition from mild themes to straight up parental abuse. they asked the question, and the celebrity laughed because it was a terrible segue, but maybe it was unintentional. after they answered the question posed by the moderator, said moderator then adds in the most lighthearted, joking tone "any more thoughts about parental abuse?" and forces laughter onto the audience. i think i was the only person in the ballroom who didn't laugh, but i feel like it was nervous laughter because it would have been very awkward otherwise. at this point, i did see a few people leave. i thought they could have been going to the washroom, but they never returned. i wish i could've done the same.

the celebrity, at one point, mentions not being able to process trauma until many years later and the moderator jokes "even with the therapy it would probably take that long". that was one of the most WTF moments i had that night. 

another time, the celebrity recounts a story about how they want to help everyone through whatever they're going through, even to the point where they will often neglect themselves in the process and the moderator unnecessarily jumps in and goes "you can't help someone who doesn't want to help themselves, that's the best advice i received" which had nothing to do with what they said. the celebrity just says "cool." and tries to move on. i could tell they really weren't vibing with the moderator, and neither was anyone else afterward... however, something i noticed was there were people dying laughing when the moderator made fucked up jokes at the celebrity's expense. i think it's interesting how those same people are criticizing the moderator for being ill-prepared for the discussion. i don't know, i really do find it interesting. 

at the end, when time has run out, the moderator disappears and two of the student led organization members come out to ask the celebrity some fan submitted questions. after that was over, the celebrity ran off stage as soon as possible. there was a hardly a goodbye, but i couldn't blame them at all.

shortly after the event, i convened with my brother and told him how awful the moderator was. the next day, i opened instagram to see an apology to the celebrity from the student led organization about how the moderator behaved. i didn't realise anyone else felt the way i did, until i looked at the comments. flooded with criticisms of the moderator and largely shared disappointment from everyone.

i feel extremely bad for the celebrity. their experiences were minimized and made a joke throughout the entire night, and there was no compassion shown, even through the laughs of the audience. i saw many comments saying it was "nervous laughter" to not sour the mood, but that entire night, i didn't laugh once at any of those "jokes" because they were cruel, and unkind. 

let's all be kinder to each other. 

***note: i use "the celebrity" as a code name of sorts, though i am acknowledging they probably don't want to be known as such.