MARRIAGE!!?

I never been fond of marrying someone, always hated, always, but lately idk, I just have the sudden urge to marry someone not just anyone random person but someone yk? Like I wanna be in the spotlight looking like a beautiful princess while my spouse is there just staring at me like I'm the most beautiful women. But, at the same time I hate the attention, and hate when others just stare at me, and the idea of kissing my spouse in front of people especiaccly my parents!!!!!?