why do i suck ass at chess but also am good in it

hear me out whenever i just want to play a calm quick game of chess i seem to beat ass i beat all of my friends and family and always had some sorta dominance over them in the game

i am not that bad in chess especially when im calm and chilled out about it but whenever i try to focus, shit just goes down bad and that really quickly

on chess.com i beat sum asses but also kinda struggle to get my elo up meanwhile on lichess (yes i use both leave me alone) i barely lose games

bruh i think i just need to calm down a lil when playin chess and not go full tryhard on it lmao

also how the hell can i learn proper openings i dont wanna lose half of my time only cuz i need to think what happens after e4 e5 d4 Nf6

-ocean

[EDIT] bro mr. ceo by thaiboy digital is such a good song