you deserve it. (poem)

disgust.

that's all I feel.

I'm so disgusted with myself.

how could I be so atrocious?

Hateful things flow through my head as I stare back at the stranger in the mirror.

" But I can't. "

" I can't start doing this, not again. "

" But I deserve it, don't I? "

I repeatedly ask myself this as the razor finds its way into my hand.

I countdown.

1 .. 2 .. 3

I finish the last number as I feel a sharp, cold poke dig through my skin.

The freshly cut wound begins to bleed

I watch as it begins to drip

Its as if my worries and my pains just flow away

Its okay, its not the end of the world.

you deserve it anyways.