STUPID BOY DRAMA

Hey SpaceHey,

So ig I owe you the story about my relationship in October. Now before I tell y’all, I need to let you know that most of the dumb decisions, if not ALL of the dumb decisions, I made were all fabricated out of boredom. Let’s go all the way back to august. You may be asking “hey Javi, what happened to that guy you met at the football game?” Well I was completely thrown tf off… turns out HE WASNT EVEN GAY. I found this out after he had asked a girl out to homecoming. At first I thought it was just a friend thing between them but then my friend told me he was serious… then one of his friends overheard me asking someone if he was bi. She confronted me and gave me a whollleeee ton of shit about how he was straight and always gets uncomfortable when people make those assumptions about him. And it’s like I’ll always accept someone for who they are and if you tell me you’re straight I’ll respect that, just as I like my choice to be respected. Here’s the thing though… you’ll never be able to convince somebody that went through exactly what you’re going through what the outcome will be because I’ve already lived through that stage YEARS ago. Yes everyone can have different ends but when they remind you so much of your past self you can’t help but see them heading toward a similar reality. And it’s not a judgmental thing… it’s tough because ik that it was one of the shittiest periods of my life and I wish i had someone to teach me the right way to do things. But that’s the thing… there is no right a wrong way. Nothing is guaranteed, except for the fact that you’ll most likely be shitted on by a lot of people… but later on, you’ll realize that them leaving you was one of the greatest things that could’ve happened… bc they left space for new healthy relationships to grow.

So back to the main story I had a friend that went to my old school. One night he had posted a picture of him and some guy, making it known they were dating. And honestly, I felt soo happy. I felt happy bc I had some sort of guilt tied to him. See when I went to that school that friend had developed some sort of feelings and I just completely friend-zoned him. I really didn’t feel the same way about him. And honestly that’s one thing I really hate about this whole being gay thing. Why is it that I can’t have a gay friend that doesn’t fall for me… or sometimes vice versa, why do I sometimes imagine myself fucking up a friendship… which I did once sooo, that is a very very very intriguing story that I’ll save for later. But point of story is that he had now gotten a boyfriend that was supposedly a new gay guy at my old school. About a month later I get a text from that friend’s “new” boyfriend. He had swiped up on a story that I posted of me at one of my old school's football games. I was very confused as to how he even knew me and how he had gotten my social considering I had no connections… not even my friend. He was asking if I had attended that school. That answer was obvious. As the questions continued I started feeling a flirty intention. And I was automatically a bit pissed. Not only did it seem like he was trying to cheat on my friend but the way he was flirting just pissed me off… I like men that get to the point and get bold. He was just going on and on like I had never wanted to tell someone to stfu so badly in my life lmfao. So to save myself from insanity I asked him why he was suddenly interested in me and what had happened to his relationship with my friend. He then told me he thought I was cute blah blah blah wtvr. He told me that they had recently split. And that just pissed me off even more bc who do I look like, being someone’s rebound. Not to mention dating my friend’s EX. He then proceeded to text me every day. And he was nice don’t get me wrong. He really liked to use flattery but the thing is. That doesn’t work on a boy who gets compliments frequently. Also, I had gone around and asked other friends that attend my old school about him. Everything they told me were just red flags and bad news. They said he was over-flirtatious and a cheater. Apart from that they said he had a nauseous personality. At this point, i have absolutely no intentions of actually even considering being with this guy. I could only help but think “what a face gone to waste” cuz he was cute. But he wasn’t the finest man on earth which he claimed to be. I'm telling y’all this guy was like the opposite of my type. But one day he texted me talking about my friend. He pretty much told his friend that we were talking. Which was delusional at its best… not only that but also that he wanted to be my boyfriend. And my so-called “friend” told him that I was a complete slut… that I didn’t want him for real (which is somewhat true but that’s besides the point) that I was an attention seeker, and that I only hop from boy to boy whenever I get bored. Now listen if this actively describes you, I'm all for it. But that’s not me. He painted me out to be a whore just to satisfy his thirst for a guy. And that just never sat right with me. The ugliest thing somebody can do is throw another person under the bus just for some lover. And out of all people THAT GUY. It was just sad… and at the end of it all my suspicions were all right… he was with like 4 other guys at the same time… the good thing is that I was lokey already expecting it and I could’ve cared less. It’s still kinda sad how he carries himself though… I really do hope he changes and matures.

TTYLXOXO,

JAVI💋